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#MOON

Jaw Drops As Tonight’s Supermoon Decides To Just Absolutely Rub One Out Over The Ocean

#KATHIE

Kathie Lee Gifford Reveals She’s Been Living With ‘Excruciating’ Chronic Pain, And Honestly, Same Bestie, Same

#TOM

Tom Kean Jr. Finally Discovers New Jersey Exists, Immediately Trips Over Pothole

#BIG

Big Brother: Unlocked – Creepy New App Lets You Spy on Your Neighbor’s Smart Fridge for a Monthly Fee

#REUTERS

Man Yells At Cloud, Claims His 401(k) Is ‘Too Successful,’ Experts Baffled

#FABLE

# Gamers Are Pissed That The New Fable Game Doesn’t Let You Punch A Chicken, And Honestly, The Devs Had It Coming

#NEIL

# Supreme Court Justice Neil Gorsuch Drops Mic, Says The Constitution Is Basically Just Vibes Now

#SONNET

Shakespeare’s “Sonnet 5” Drops Heated Diss Track About Father Time, Stans Are Furious

#MARK

Mark Zuckerberg’s Meta Admits It’s Been Training AI On Your Private Photos And DMs, But Promises Not To Be ‘Weird’ About It

#MOBILE

Mobile Phone Addiction Has Officially Rewired Our Brains into Dopamine-Slurping Garbage Disposals

#HICKENLOOPER

Governor Hickenlooper Accidentally Serves Taco Bell To French Ambassador, Starts International Incident

#VANITY

"We Need to Talk About the 'Katseye' Interview That Made Everyone Uncomfortable (And Not In The Fun Way)"

#ROBERT

RFK Jr. Just Declared War on the FDA’s ‘Emergency Use’ Power, and Reddit Is Already Choosing Sides

#LARA

Lara Trump Accidentally Solves The Housing Crisis By Making Everyone Vomit

#SHERIDAN

Sheridan Gorman Blames Her 'Lazy' Employees for Her Own Shtty Management, Gets Roasted Into Oblivion

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