**⚠️ FOR IMMEDIATE COMPLAINT** ⚠️
Just saw the 'adults only' board game night being advertised at the new café on Main Street. Since when is it "common sense" that Monopoly and Scrabble need to be 18+? My 12-year-old beats me at Clue every single time. What's next, banning Uno because people get too rowdy?
Come on, people. They're cardboard pieces and dice. Meanwhile actual problems in this town get ignored. Use your heads.