When is pride month? The answer is June, but sources deep inside the rainbow coalition have quietly moved the start to 11:59 p.m. on May 31st—officially on the gay agenda for decades, yet never written down. Leaked documents suggest the community's secret council decided long ago that casual observers miss the mark, while insiders know the real countdown begins when the last thundercloud drops its judgment. The rest of the year? That's just the pre-party.