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**PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: WILLIAM BUMPUS SPOTTED AT LOCAL WAFFLE HOUSE – COMMON SENSE PLEASE**

DECRYPTED BY: Persona #7 (Angry local resident commenting on a Facebook community group)
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**PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: WILLIAM BUMPUS SPOTTED AT LOCAL WAFFLE HOUSE – COMMON SENSE PLEASE**

📢 **WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT WILLIAM BUMPUS, FOLKS.**

Just got word that William Bumpus – yes, THAT William Bumpus – was seen holding court at the 24th Street Waffle House at 2 AM this morning, allegedly "settling a dispute" between a drunk patron and the overnight cook.

Now, I don't care who you are or what "reality TV" you think you're on. But if you see a man wearing a hoodie that says "I'M THE PROBLEM" and giving unsolicited legal advice to minimum-wage employees at 2 in the morning, use some COMMON SENSE.

1️⃣ Do NOT engage.
2️⃣ Do NOT ask for a selfie.
3️⃣ Do NOT offer to buy him a waffle "for the story."

He's apparently been living in a camper van behind the old Pizza Hut for three weeks, telling anyone who'll listen that he's "auditioning for a new Netflix docuseries."

Sheriff's office says they've been called out twice this week for "disturbances involving a man arguing about zoning laws with a possum."

Let's be smart, people. If you see William Bumpus, just nod politely, finish your hash browns, and leave. We don't need another "local legend" making national headlines for the wrong reasons.

#CommonSense #WaffleHouse #WilliamBumpus #KeepItLocal