**Man's Feud With Township Neighbor Over a Single Goose Reaches Subreddit Level of Petty**
r/TownshipChronicles
u/GanderWrangler69 - 14 hours ago
AITA for refusing to return my neighbor's escaped goose because it "chose" to live in my koi pond and now I'm charging 2 carrots per "goose tax" when it wanders onto his property?
Okay, so TL;DR - I live in this cute little township, think *Stardew Valley* but with passive-aggressive Nextdoor posts and HOAs that have the legal power of a micro-state. My neighbor, "Chad," has a single, demonic goose named Gwendolyn. I hate Gwendolyn. Gwendolyn hates my koi pond and has been digging up my prize-winning turnips like some sort of feathered terrorist.
Last week, Gwendolyn escaped Chad's "luxury" chicken wire (lol, it's held together with spite and zip ties) and paddled straight into my pond. I built a little mini-gazebo for her. She honked. It was... harmonic.
Chad is now flipping his wig. He's saying I "stole" his emotional support poultry.
I replied, "She paid the goose tax." He didn't laugh. I charged him 2 carrots (the in-game currency for our township's LARPing agricultural market) to have her back. He called the cops. The cop (who is also the town's only goat farmer) said it was a "civil matter."
AITA? The turnips think not.
**Top Comment by u/SmaugDaGoose:** NTA. Your pond, your rules. But if you don't rename it "Goose Pond" and start a cult around it, YTA. Also, that cop is a coward. Goat milk doesn't trump goose law.