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#DAVID

David Clayton Thomas Thinks ‘Woke’ Is Why His Music Career Tanked, But We Have Other Theories

#ANNA

Neighbors Block Influencer’s House With Giant Pile Of Garbage, She Calls Cops, Gets Clapped With Reality Check

#BRAMERTON

Bramerton Bloke Claims He Saw a ‘Panther’ (Or Just Really Wants His 15 Minutes of Fame)

#IS

Ticketmaster Crashes Harder Than Your Chances Of Getting Decent Concert Seats

#USHA

Usha Vance Just Became America’s Least Likely Power Couple, And The Internet Is Losing Its Damn Mind

#DOUG

Doug Martin Spotted Alive and Well, Still Owning the NFL’s ‘Muscle Hamster’ Legacy in the Most Unhinged Way Possible

#GILMORE

# Gilmore Girls Fans Are Furious That Netflix Is Finally Doing the Obvious Thing

#LIONEL

Lionel Richie Finally Loses It, Tells Fan ‘Play ‘All Night Long’ One More Time and I’ll End It All’ During Hellish Brunch Show

#VACCINE

I Got The Jab And Now My 5G Reception Is Still Trash, AMA

#CITIZEN

Florida Man’s Neighborhood Watch App Mistakes Mailman for ‘Sovereign Citizen Spy,’ Ends With Taser and a Lawsuit

#TPS

Supreme Court Drops Bombshell: TPS Holders Can Now Stay, But Only If They Survive The Comments Section

#KELSEY

Man Child Actor Demands To Be Paid In Gold Bars, Blames ‘Woke Hollywood’ For Ruining His Lunch

#FORTNITE

Sweaty Fortnite Tryhards Furious After Servers Go Down, Literally Nothing Else To Do Now Except Touch Grass

#SPRING

Spring Has Sprung: The Annual Gaslighting Festival Where We Pretend Pollen Allergies Are a Vibe

#ALITO

# SCOTUS Drama: Alito and Sotomayor’s “Cordial” Lunch Spotted, Internet Melts Down Over Whether They Actually Like Each Other

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