An Indianapolis man named Marcos James Schmitz apparently decided the fastest route to clout was crowdfunding a Tesla Cybertruck, because nothing says "I've made sound financial decisions" like asking strangers to bankroll a stainless steel doorstop with a controversial silhouette.
Schmitz set up a GoFundMe hoping the internet would chip in for the vehicle, which starts around $80,000 before you even get to the part where you discover the truck's wiper blade costs more than your rent.
The campaign, as you might guess, did not exactly rocket to the moon.
The internet is a lot of things — horny, bored, easily distracted by a raccoon in a tiny hat — but it is not generally in the business of buying luxury EVs for guys named Marcos in Indiana.
Commenters, as is tradition, treated the whole thing like an open mic night.
Some roasted the Cybertruck's polarizing design, which looks like a DeLorean that got left in the microwave.
Others pointed out that if you need a crowd to buy your car, maybe a 2011 Civic with a check-engine light and a dream is more your speed.
Now, to be fair, GoFundMe is a graveyard of questionable ambitions.
People have raised money for potato salad, for a guy who wanted to make a second potato salad, and for countless trips that were definitely "once in a lifetime" and definitely not just a weekend in Vegas.
So Schmitz isn't breaking new ground here — he's just adding a new gravestone to the cemetery.
But there's a certain flavor of audacity in asking the public to fund a vehicle that is, by most accounts, a rolling conversation starter that you did not consent to.
It's a truck that looks like it was designed by someone who only ever saw a car in a dream and then described it to a police sketch artist.
The internet's response was predictably split between people who found it hilarious and people who found it hilarious but also mean about it.
That's the thing about going viral — you don't get to pick which kind of famous you become.
Whether Schmitz ever gets his Cybertruck remains unclear, but he did get the one thing the algorithm truly craves: attention.
And honestly, in 2024, that might be the only currency left that still has value.
The real lesson here isn't about crowdfunding or electric vehicles or even the specific architectural choices of one Elon Musk fever dream.
It's that the internet will always, always show up — just not necessarily to help.
Sometimes it shows up to point and laugh, and sometimes it does both at once while someone in the comments asks if the truck comes with a free personality.
Final Thoughts
May your GoFundMe reach the three people who think this is a great idea, and may they all be your cousins.