The New Face of Feminism Is a 14-Year-Old Boy Who Just Discovered Atheism and Mansplaining
**Body**
Oh, fantastic. Just what the discourse needed: another cis-het white dude, freshly pubescent, who has just unlocked the secrets of the universe via a YouTube algorithm rabbit hole and is now here to explain why Gloria Steinem had it all wrong. According to a new profile in *Ms.* Magazine—yes, that *Ms.* Magazine, the one your aunt still gets in print—the future of the movement isn't a woman of color, a union organizer, or even a disgruntled barista. It's Kevin, a 14-year-old from Ohio who has declared himself a "gender abolitionist" because he read a Wikipedia article on Simone de Beauvoir for 20 minutes.
Let’s unpack this dumpster fire, shall we?
The profile, titled "The Boy King of the Fourth Wave," paints a picture of a truly revolutionary figure. Kevin—who prefers the pronouns "he/him" but will "begrudgingly" accept "they/them" if it gets him laid at the upcoming Model UN conference—has identified the root of all patriarchal oppression. It’s not the systemic devaluation of domestic labor. It’s not the gender pay gap. It’s not the fact that 1 in 3 women will experience physical violence in their lifetime.
No, it’s **math**. Specifically, the fact that geometry class starts at 7:45 AM.
“It’s, like, a fundamentally phallocentric construct,” Kevin explains in the piece, adjusting his fedora. “The early start time forces students into a circadian rhythm that prioritizes linear, goal-oriented thinking, which is a tool of the capitalist-patriarchy. We need to deconstruct the very notion of time itself.” He then pauses, takes a sip from a Hydro Flask filled with what we can only assume is lukewarm Gatorade, and adds, “It’s just basic logic. I read about it on Reddit.”
The article goes on to detail Kevin’s "radical" policy platform. First and foremost: the complete abolition of gender. But not in a cool, Judith Butler, "gender is performative" kind of way. In a "so, like, if we don't have genders, then you can't be mad at me for saying 'women aren't funny,' because we're all just people, and some people are less funny than others, and that's just science" kind of way.
When pressed by the *Ms.* reporter on the fact that, historically, the abolition of gender in the abstract has often been used to ignore the very real, material struggles of women, Kevin simply rolled his eyes so hard he nearly gave himself a concussion. “That’s such a binary way of thinking,” he scoffed. “You’re gendering my argument. You’re making it about *me* being a man, which is a sexist microaggression. I’m not a man. I’m a human. And my ideas are just objectively correct.”
Ah, yes. The classic "I'm not a man, I'm a human" defense. A tactic so old and so tired that even the crustiest of 1970s second-wave feminists would tell him to go back to playing Fortnite.
The profile is littered with cringe-worthy moments. He critiques bell hooks for being "too emotional." He suggests that the solution to the overturning of *Roe v. Wade* is to "just get a time machine, duh." And he claims to have a "deep, spiritual connection" to the Suffragettes because he once wore a white dress shirt to a school dance.
But the real kicker, the part that has the entire feminist internet choking on their oat milk lattes, is his "Master Plan for Liberation." It involves a mandatory re-education program where all citizens must watch *The Good Place* and then participate in a group chat to discuss their feelings. When the reporter points out that this sounds a little totalitarian, Kevin looks at her with the pitying gaze of a 14-year-old who just discovered he can grow a mustache.
“You’re thinking with your patriarchal conditioning,” he says. “My plan is based on *logic*. It’s not my fault if you can’t handle the truth.”
He then proceeds to explain why women are statistically better at parallel parking (which he argues is a sign of a "subservient spatial awareness") and why men are inherently better at "big picture" thinking, which is why he, a 14-year-old boy, should be the one to lead the revolution. The sheer, unadulterated irony is so thick you could choke on it. He's purportedly fighting for equality while simultaneously suggesting that his male brain is just wired differently for leadership.
The response online has been, predictably, a bloodbath. Women on Twitter are posting the "This is fine" dog meme. Long-time feminists are writing think-pieces about the death of critical thought. Androgynous non-binary activists are saying, "Hey, even *we* think this guy is a tool." The only people defending him are the other 14-year-old boys who also just discovered Ayn Rand and are currently in the middle of their own "enlightenment" phase, where they think being contrarian is a personality.
*Ms.* Magazine is, of course, standing by their story. In a statement, the editor-in-chief said, "We felt it was time to highlight a new, intersectional voice that challenges the old guard. Kevin represents the future—a future where we don't just talk about gender, we transcend it by arguing with women on the internet until they block us."
The article ends with a heartwarming scene. Kevin is in his mom’s minivan, being driven to a debate tournament. He’s explaining to her why she is a "breeder" who is complicit in her own oppression by not letting him get a TikTok account. His mom, who works two jobs, just nods and says, "That's nice, honey," while secretly thinking about the glass of chardonnay she’s going to pour the second
Final Thoughts
Having tracked the evolution of feminist media for decades, it's clear that *Ms.*'s true legacy isn't just its archival value, but its stubborn insistence that journalism can be a tool for organizing, not just informing. The magazine's journey from a bold, countercultural insert to a nonprofit institution mirrors the movement's own difficult maturation—trading some of its radical fire for institutional staying power. Ultimately, its survival proves that a publication can remain fiercely relevant not by chasing trends, but by holding a mirror to society and refusing to let women's realities be edited out of the frame.