Swimming Pool Owners Are Calling the Cops on Teens Who DARE to Exist in Public Water
Look, I know we’ve all been waiting with bated breath for the next chapter in the ongoing saga of “How Can Adults Make Teenagers’ Lives Even More Miserable,” and boy, did the universe deliver. If you thought the era of Karens calling the cops on lemonade stands was over, strap in, because we’ve leveled up. Now, the drama is splashing into your local community pool, and it’s giving major “I peaked in high school and now I’m taking it out on your children” energy.
So here’s the deal. A new Reddit post, which is basically the town square of modern grievances, is absolutely blowing up on r/AITA. The OP is a 47-year-old homeowner in a swanky HOA community in Arizona. This guy owns a pool. Not a public pool. Not a YMCA. His personal, chlorinated kingdom. And he is PISSED because the neighborhood teenagers—you know, the feral little goblins who are constitutionally required to cannonball and scream—keep using it. Except, plot twist: he’s not just annoyed. He’s called the police on them. Multiple times. For swimming. In a pool. In July.
The post, which reads like a fever dream written by the ghost of a Homeowners Association president who died of a stick up their ass, details how the OP has a “beautiful in-ground pool” that he uses “maybe once a week.” But the neighborhood kids, ages 14-17, have allegedly been “trespassing” to take a dip when he’s at work. He says he’s installed a fence. He says he’s put up signs. He says he’s yelled at them. And now, after the third police visit, the cops basically told him to stop wasting their time because they have actual crimes to solve, like porch pirates and people who leave their shopping carts in the middle of the parking lot.
And the internet? Oh, the internet is feasting. The top comment, which has like 14,000 upvotes, just says: “YTA. You live in Arizona. It’s 115 degrees. You are mad that water is wet.” Another gem: “Bro bought a pool just to play warden. Get a life or fill it with concrete.” But the real kicker is the OP’s defense: “They’re loud. They leave wet footprints. They don’t even know my name. It’s disrespectful.” Sir, they are 14. They don’t know their own names half the time. They’re running on Monster Energy and TikTok brain rot. They’re not plotting to overthrow your HOA; they’re just hot.
But here’s the thing that’s got the whole thread spiral-y: the OP admits that he literally uses the pool maybe once a week. He has a pool that sits empty and chlorinated for 6 days a week while teenagers in a desert climate are literally melting. And his solution is to call the cops? Not to, I don’t know, talk to their parents? Not to install a lock? Not to just accept that you live in a neighborhood and kids are going to be kids? No. He called the police because some high schoolers wanted to cool off.
And let’s be real, this isn’t just about a pool. This is the same energy as the guy who yells at kids for walking on his lawn. The same vibe as the woman who films people in the grocery store for breathing wrong. It’s the great American pastime of being a complete buzzkill. We have all collectively decided that teenagers are public enemy number one, and we’re shocked that they’re all developing anxiety and a burning hatred for the silent generation. Shocker.
The comments are a beautiful dumpster fire of people roasting this guy. Someone calculated the exact volume of water he’s wasting by keeping it empty. Someone else pointed out that in Arizona, it’s actually illegal to let a pool sit empty because it becomes a mosquito breeding ground. So this dude is literally breaking the law by being a dick. Another user brought up the classic “Well, if they get heatstroke on your property, you’re getting sued anyway, so you might as well let them swim and be a hero.” That’s the kind of galaxy brain logic I live for.
But the OP is doubling down. In the comments, he’s arguing that “rules are rules” and that “if they wanted to swim, they should ask.” And to that, I say: have you ever met a teenager? They don’t ask. They just do. They are chaos agents. They are biologically incapable of asking permission. That’s the whole point. You think they’re going to knock on your door and say, “Excuse me, sir, may I please use your pool to escape the literal hellscape that is an Arizona summer?” No. They’re going to hop the fence, make a TikTok about it, and leave a floatie behind. That’s the contract you signed when you bought a house near a school zone.
And let’s talk about the police response. The cops showed up, saw a bunch of kids in a pool, and probably wanted to jump in themselves. They have better things to do. There are catalytic converter thieves running rampant. There are people stealing Amazon packages. There are cars getting broken into. And you’re calling 911 because a 15-year-old did a cannonball? The dispatcher probably put you on the “annoying caller” list. That’s a real thing. They have a list.
Honestly, the only people winning in this scenario are the teenagers. They get a free pool, a story to tell their therapist later, and the knowledge that they’re living rent-free in this guy’s head. He’s out there checking his backyard camera like it’s the Zapruder film. Meanwhile, the kids are probably planning their next swim session right now, with a cooler of Gatorade and a Bluetooth speaker.
So, is this guy the asshole
Final Thoughts
Having covered everything from Olympic pools to murky open-water venues, I’ve come to see swimming as the rare sport that strips away all pretense: there’s no equipment to blame, no teammate to pass to, just you and the crushing silence of the water. It’s a brutal, solitary negotiation with your own breath and fear, yet it’s also the closest we get to flight. Ultimately, the real victory isn’t the lap count or the medal—it’s learning to trust the water, and yourself, when the bottom drops out.