Remember when we could just look up at the northern lights without the power grid threatening to go dark? Now they’re calling this a ‘severe geomagnetic storm’ and telling us to charge our phones and fill the bathtub. Common sense says if Mother Nature can fry our satellites with a solar burp, maybe we should invest in some actual backup infrastructure instead of just buying more batteries and candles at the dollar store. But sure, tell me again how this is ‘amazing’—my uncle's pacemaker just got a firmware update he didn't ask for.