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"Local Man Furious FF7 Revelation Proves His ‘Tifa Best Girl’ Argument Was Scientifically Incorrect This Whole Time, AITA For Crying In The GameStop Parking Lot?"

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"Local Man Furious FF7 Revelation Proves His ‘Tifa Best Girl’ Argument Was Scientifically Incorrect This Whole Time, AITA For Crying In The GameStop Parking Lot?"

So, like, my nerdy pal "Chad" just dropped a lore bomb on me that, apparently, Tifa’s famous bangle in the original FF7 is actually a hyper-specific training weight for her *other*, uh, "bangles." This whole FF7 revelation basically means my meticulously curated fan art folder is *wrong* and I’m just supposed to accept that her character model was a lie? I’m having a full-on existential crisis in the checkout line, clutching a Sephiroth Funko Pop. TL;DR: My childhood is ruined, my waifu is a lie, and I’m currently questioning if I’m even real.