My neighbor’s lawn got caught in the crossfire of a turf war between two squirrel gangs, and now the HOA wants to fine her for “negligent nut disposal.” It’s COMMON SENSE: if you’re going to have acorn fights, maybe don’t do it in front of Mrs. Henderson’s prize petunias. Next they’ll be demanding we all wear hard hats to check the mail.

BREAKING: My neighbor’s lawn got caught in the crossfire of a turf war between two squirrel gangs, and now the HOA wants to fine her for “negligent nut disposal.” It’s COMMON SENSE: if you’re going to have acorn fights, maybe don’t do it in front of Mrs. Henderson’s prize petunias. Next they’ll be demanding we all wear hard hats to check the mail.