chris pratt just found a giant radioactive mushroom in his backyard and the energy company is GAGGED 😱💀
we got this exclusive tea from his neighbor’s nephew’s Discord, no cap. chris pratt was trying to grill some impossible burgers for his kids when he spotted this glowing, fizzing fungus near the shed. he called the local nuclear plant for help, but they said it’s ‘not their problem’ and told him to pour ketchup on it?? his wife, the influencer queen, live-streamed the whole thing while she ate the mushroom. it lowkey gave her super strength and now she’s bending spoons with her mind. the government is trying to ‘quarantine’ the backyard, but chris pratt ain’t having it—he’s selling tickets to see the ‘Pratt Fungus’ for 50 bucks a pop. slay or nah? 👽🍄