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TSA Can’t Decide If Airport Coconuts Are ‘Biological Hazards’ or Just Really, Really Rude

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TSA Can’t Decide If Airport Coconuts Are ‘Biological Hazards’ or Just Really, Really Rude

In a viral twist no one saw coming, the TSA has grounded a passenger for carrying a pair of coconuts—but not because they’re afraid you’ll use them as hand grenades. The irony? The agency’s official line cites “potential ambulatory threat,” which is memespeak for “these fruits looked at your agent wrong.” Social media is now flooded with videos of travelers caramelizing their carry-on produce, asking “Is this a weapon or just weird chutzpah?” The TSA insists the viral craze is a joke, yet their handbook now includes a new rule: If it looks like a head, shakes like a head, and travels alone, you better fill out Form 69—in duplicate.