JUST IN: NATIONAL DONUT DAY TURNS DEADLY AS DONUT SHOP BRAWL ERUPTS OVER LAST GLAZED RING!
EXCLUSIVE: POLICE SWARM THE SCENE—WITNESSES CLAIM A MASKED CROWD STORMED A LOCAL SHOP, ALL FOR A SINGLE DOZEN! CUSTOMERS CAN’T BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENED NEXT, AS A FRENZY OF PUNCHES AND FLOUR IN THE AIR LEFT THE SHOP IN SHAMBLES! IS THIS THE CRUNCHIEST, MOST CHAOTIC NATIONAL DONUT DAY EVER? YOU WON’T BELIEVE WHO THE RAIDERS WERE…