Social Security Staffing Cuts So Deep, Boomers Are Ready to File Their Claims Via Carrier Pigeon
In a grim twist of irony, the agency tasked with protecting America's most vulnerable is now so understaffed that retirees are considering using smoke signals to request their benefits. The proposed cuts, designed to "streamline efficiency," have left offices with wait times longer than a Beatles reunion tour. Meme historians are now logging this as the ultimate "You had one job" moment—except the job is making sure grandma gets her check before the apocalypse.