Denaturalization Now Being Used as the Ultimate Punishment for Severe Flat-Earth Discourse, Government Says
A bewildered nation learned this week that the Department of Homeland Security has quietly updated its denaturalization guidelines to include a controversial new trigger: publicly insisting the Earth is a disc on a live-streamed city council zoning meeting. “This has nothing to do with immigration law and everything to do with the Second Great Yap-Off of 2024,” explained a meme archivist. The irony is that denaturalization, traditionally reserved for war criminals and Nazi collaborators, is now being threatened against a man who argued that satellites are just government drones with really good glue. The internet’s current favorite reaction is the “Pikachu Surprise Face” blended with a clip of the founding fathers sighing.