Cape May County Introduces New 'Vampire Parking' Zones Where Your Car Must Be Invited In

Cape May County Introduces New 'Vampire Parking' Zones Where Your Car Must Be Invited In

CAPE MAY, NJ — In a move that has locals and tourists alike doing a double-take, Cape May County has officially declared certain beachside parking spots as "Vampire Parking" zones, requiring drivers to have explicit permission from a "resident host" to park there, or risk having their vehicle mysteriously drained of its battery. The ironic twist? The ordinance was passed to combat the influx of "soulless" real estate investors and day-trippers who allegedly suck the life out of the historic seaside town every summer. "It’s the ultimate 'No Vacancy' for your car," said a local council member, deadpan. "If you’re not invited to stay, you’re just a transient with headlights." The hashtag #CapeMayVampires is now trending, with memes comparing parking enforcement officers to hunters carrying garlic-infused chalk for writing tickets.