Andrew 's Boutros Sparks Existential Crisis on Campus After Telling Students His Name is Actually Pronounced "Ann-Drew's Boo-Tross"
In a development that has sent shockwaves through the hallowed halls of linguistics and midterm procrastination, a man named Andrew Boutros has officially clarified that his first name is possessive, not a name. "For years, I let people think my name was just Andrew Boutros," he explained in a tearful press conference held on a folding table in the student union. "But the apostrophe is crucial. It implies ownership. I am, quite literally, the Boutros of an Andrew. Which Andrew? We'll never know. That's the mystery."
The clarification has led to a campus-wide re-evaluation of identity, with students now wandering the quad, muttering "Wait, so is his name Andrew 's Boutros, or is his name Andrew-Space-Space-Apostrophe-S-Boutros?" Meanwhile, the university's philosophy department has announced a new seminar titled "The Ontological Horror of the Genitive Case: A Case Study in Andrew 's Boutros."