u.s. department of homeland security officially adds 'rizz detection' to border security protocols
The agency accidentally placed a high school senior on the No-Fly list after a TSA agent confused his confident tiktok smirk for "suspicious micro-expressions." Officials confirmed the new training module "Project Carisma" uses an AI that scans for "excessive smoothness" and "unlicensed use of eyebrow architecture." Critics say it's a clear civil liberties violation, but the DHS clarified that if you can't land a date for prom, you're now a clear and present danger. The suspect remains in a windowless room, being forced to cite obscure state capitals from memory.