Full moon May 2026 has the local lunatics howling at nothing, police say stop wasting our time with wolf calls.
Oh, for crying out loud, another full moon in May 2026 and suddenly everyone in this town loses every ounce of common sense. I just saw three different posts about "werewolf sightings" and "glowing eyes" in the woods off Maple Street. It’s a moon, you absolute goobers. It’s a big, shiny rock in the sky. My dog howled once, and now my neighbor is convinced we’re hosting a paranormal convention. Newsflash: the cops said they’ve had five "suspicious animal" calls tonight that were just raccoons looking for trash. Do we really need to tie up emergency services because you can’t tell the difference between a coyote and a werewolf? Get a grip, people. The only thing supernatural here is the lack of brain cells.