Tom Kean Jr. Skips Another Vote, Colleagues 'Shocked' to Discover He Was at a Chili Cook-Off Instead
OMG, AITA for thinking our guy Tom Kean Jr. is actually just ghosting his job to become a competitive chili master? TL;DR: My guy Tom Kean Jr. has been MIA from Congress so much that his absence impact is basically creating a new black hole in the Capitol. We’re talking fewer votes, deadlocked committees, and his staffers have resorted to using a cardboard cutout of him during roll calls. But plot twist: the real reason for the 'absence impact' isn't some secret health crisis. Nope. He was allegedly spotted judging a regional chili cook-off in New Jersey. I guess whether or not we pass a budget is secondary to whether he prefers beans or no beans in his chili. The audacity. Anyway, can we impeach him for crimes against quorum? Asking for a friend.