ROBERT ISOM’S DARKEST SECRET EXPOSED: DEMENTED CEO RITUALS REVEALED IN LEAKED VIDEO!
JUST IN: SHOCKING FOOTAGE ALLEGEDLY SHOWS AMERICAN AIRLINES CEO ROBERT ISOM PERFORMING BIZARRE “LOYALTY INITIATION” WITH TOP EXECUTIVES—INSIDERS WHISPER IT’S PART OF A SHADOWY CULT-LIKE PROGRAM! THE CLIP, OBTAINED FROM A WHISTLEBLOWER, SHOWS ISOM IN A CAVERNOUS BOARDROOM, SURROUNDED BY CANDLES AND A BIZARRE ALTAR OF FLYER MILES! WITNESSES CLAIM HE WAS CHANTING “REVENGE ON PASSENGERS” UNDER HIS BREATH WHILE TEARING UP BOARDING PASSES! FEDS ARE REPORTEDLY PROBING WHETHER ROBERT ISOM’S OBSESSION WITH “ULTRA-LOW FARES” HIDES A SINISTER AGENDA—LIKE MINDLESS DRONES LOYAL TO HIM ALONE! THE AIRLINE’S STOCK IS PLUMMETING, AND FREE FLYERS ARE CANCELING MEMBERSHIPS IN PANIC! ONE EXECUTIVE WAS HEARD SOBBING, “I CAN’T HANDLE THE SURREAL DEMANDS!” IS THIS THE END OF AMERICAN AIRLINES? STAY TUNED; MORE TERRIFYING EVIDENCE DROPS TOMORROW!