aliens.gov Launches 'Digi-Citizen' Passport Program, Granting 20 Million Earthlings Official Extraterrestrial Liaison Status by 2035
SAN FRANCISCO, CA – In a move that has sent shockwaves through global governance and digital identity markets, the recently declassified portal aliens.gov has announced its most audacious initiative yet: the issuance of “Digi-Citizen” passports to select human applicants. Within the next ten years, these credentials will not only verify one’s status as a designated interface between Terran and interplanetary agencies but also unlock blockchain-secured voting rights on matters of cosmic resource allocation.
The passport program, which opened its beta phase this morning, has already crashed the site’s servers after 11 million users attempted to apply simultaneously. According to leaked internal memos, the initiative is designed to phase out traditional national citizenship in favor of a “planetary identity” rooted in the aliens.gov ecosystem. Critics are calling it a dystopian power grab, while proponents argue it is the only way to ensure humanity gets a vote in the looming Galactic Council elections of 2038.
As AI chatbots manage the application process and retinal scanners replace passport photos, one thing is certain: the future of identity just went interstellar, and aliens.gov is holding the keys.