**Exclusive: ELON MUSK CRASHES STEAM DECK PARTY – Gabe Newell’s REACTION is SHOCKING**
*HOLLYWOOD, CA* – The red carpet was literally smoking. Not from dry ice, but from pure, unadulterated *drama*.
We were on the scene at the “Gaming’s Most Wanted” gala, expecting a quiet night of indie devs and LCD screen upgrades. We were wrong.
Suddenly, the crowd parted. Not for a movie star, but for a sound. The *whirring fan of a Steam Deck*. And who was holding it? ELON MUSK.
Dressed in a tuxedo shirt and a “Dogecoin to the Moon” pin, Musk marched straight up to Valve’s Gabe Newell, who was mid-sip of a celebratory champagne.
“Gabe,” Musk boomed. “I have a proposition. Your hardware. My neuralink. Imagine playing *Baldur’s Gate 3* with your *thoughts*.”
Gabe, notoriously quiet, simply blinked. The crowd gasped. You could hear a pin drop.
But then… the *shock*.
Gabe Newell, literally *steam* coming out of his ears (we think it was just the vape pen), took one long look at Musk’s modified Steam Deck, which was apparently running a *custom Linux kernel for orbital re-entry*.
He then did the *unthinkable*.
Gabe took the Steam Deck, turned it over, and sprayed it with a fire extinguisher labeled “Anti-Elon.”
“No,” Gabe whispered, the mic catching it perfectly. “It runs on *Proton*. Not on *ego*.”
The crowd ERUPTED. Elon stood there, stunned, as his custom Deck sizzled. A source tells us exclusively that the device was