**Breaking: Nicolas Cage Says He Has a 'Life Coach' — and It's a Haunted 1950s Jukebox**
Nicolas Cage has revealed the bizarre secret to his mental wellness: a psychic life coach that is literally a haunted jukebox from the 1950s.
In an interview that is already breaking the internet, the actor claimed that the vintage Wurlitzer—which he keeps in his private "vibes room"—speaks to him in the voice of a deceased lounge singer.
"The jukebox doesn't give affirmations. It gives commands," Cage said with a straight face. "Every morning, it plays 'Heartbreak Hotel.' That’s my cue to stop self-sabotaging."
While fans are confused, life coaches everywhere are taking notes. Could the secret to your success be hiding in your grandmother's basement? Experts say: probably not. But if your toaster starts telling you to "manifest your chaos," maybe listen.