**BREAKING: NICOLAS CAGE MELTS DOWN AT CANNES – CLAIMS HE "SMELLS THE DEVIL"**
**CANNES, FRANCE –** It was supposed to be a triumphant return to the Palais des Festivals for National Treasure Nicolas Cage, but the red carpet turned into a psychological horror scene last night.
Witnesses are still shaking as the 60-year-old actor, wearing a blood-red velvet tuxedo, froze mid-stride, squinted at the swarm of photographers, and shouted, **"WHO INVITED HIM? I CAN SMELL THE SULFUR!"**
According to terrified onlookers, Cage then pointed at a confused journalist, claiming the man’s aura was "burning green." He refused to move, muttering about a "fracture in the timeline" and demanding a "raw egg" to "balance the frequencies."
His publicist reportedly whispered, "It’s just the flashbulbs, Nic," to which Cage allegedly replied, **"THE FLASHBULBS ARE TALKING TO ME. THEY SAY THE SEQUEL IS A TRAP."**
The actor eventually had to be physically escorted down the carpet by security, all while screaming about his "lost honeybees." Meanwhile, a source close to the actor says the meltdown is part of an immersive promotional stunt for his upcoming multiverse thriller *The Uncanny*.
**Exclusive follow-up:** Cage was later spotted at a back-alley bistro, buying three dozen snails, which he reportedly insisted were "time travelers." We are not making this up.