**CNN BREAKING: Trump Storms Out of Court After Judge Refuses to Let Him ‘Make the Courthouse Great Again’**
**Washington, D.C. (CNN)** — In a scene straight out of a political comedy sketch, former President Donald Trump reportedly exited a federal courtroom Wednesday after a judge declined his request to install a golden escalator and a MAGA-themed snack bar in the jury lounge. Witnesses say Trump paused at the doors, turned around, and told reporters, “You can’t have a fair trial without a Diet Coke button on the bench. This is a hoax—a total hoax of a building.”
Legal analysts are now trying to determine if this is a reversible error or just the best ratings CNN has seen since the 2020 election coverage. Meanwhile, the judge reportedly asked the bailiff to please “remove the crowd of people chanting ‘Lock her up’ at the vending machine.”
**Trending now:** #EscalatorGate — featuring a new viral video of Trump throwing a pack of Skittles at a camera while shouting, “The system is rigged... but these are delicious.”