**HEADLINE: WILD HUNT OF HEARTS! CIRI BREAKS DOWN, GERALT CAUGHT IN LOVE TRIANGLE SHOCKER AT ‘WITCHER 3’ RED CARPET**
**RED CARPET EXCLUSIVE – NOVIGRAD**
The red carpet for *The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt* anniversary gala just turned into a full-blown soap opera, and we’ve got the exclusive scoop that will have you spilling your fisstech.
Sources tell us that fan-favorite Ciri was seen having a meltdown backstage after a photographer’s flash sent her into a panic. “She screamed, ‘I’m not a pawn!’ and kicked over a tray of hors d’oeuvres,” a trembling waiter told us. “Geralt just stared at his Gwent card collection.”
But that’s not the only drama! Tension between the White Wolf and a mystery redhead reached a fever pitch when Geralt was spotted whispering in the ear of Yennefer of Vengerberg… while TRISS MERIGOLD watched from behind a potted plant. One insider claims Triss screamed, “I’m the one who got you through the hunt, you bald-faced mutie!” before storming off.
“I’ve never seen so many sorceresses hurl so much static electricity over a guy with a white wig,” said a baffled Dandelion, who was busy trying to sell autographs to a crowd of werewolves. “This is better than the play I wrote about the Wild Hunt’s tax problems!”
**YES, THE DRAMA. THE GLAMOUR. THE SUDDEN INVOCATION OF A VEXING BUG THAT TURNS ALL CHARACTERS INTO NAKED BOTTLES OF LARD. WE ARE NOT IN KERA MOGH ANYMORE!**
Stay tuned as we figure out if Geralt