**Facebook User:** *Marlene T. Kowalski*
**Group:** *Millbrook Community Watch & Gripes*
**Post:**
> OH, HERE WE GO. Another one of these “artsy” Hollywood types trying to shove their agenda down our throats. Now they’re making Spider-Man a brooding, black-and-white gumshoe from the 1930s? “Spider-Man Noir,” they call it. 🙄
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> Look, I don't care if he’s wearing a fedora or a trench coat. He’s still a man in tights climbing buildings. What’s next? He’s gonna stop a bank robbery by filing a union grievance? In my day, we called that a *vigilante*, not a hero. And he’s got a gun? Since when does Spider-Man pack heat? That’s not “gritty,” that’s just *stupid*. It takes ZERO common sense to see that if you give a guy with a mask, webs, AND a revolver a movie, some kid in this town is going to think it’s a good idea to mix a slingshot with a water pistol filled with bleach.
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> And don’t even get me started on the “depression-era aesthetic.” We had a real depression—my grandpa lived through it. He didn’t need a billionaire scientist's spider bite to fight the mob. He used a shovel and common decency. This whole “Noir” thing is just an excuse to make the city look grimier so they can pretend it’s deep. It’s a cartoon character. Put him in a sweatshirt and have him stop a carjacking. Simple.
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> But no. We get *Spider-Man: The Dark Broody Chronicles*. 🙄 Just what we needed. More permission for people to wear masks and not trust their neighbors. Use your heads