**BREAKING: Education System in Shambles as Student Discovers "Lear" is Just an Obsolete Verb for "Teach," Immediately Demands Refund for Entire Degree**
*Washington, D.C.* – In a development that has sent shockwaves through academic circles, a 22-year-old senior has gone viral after publicly declaring that she has "unlocked the ultimate life hack" by realizing that the word "lear" is, in fact, an archaic and rarely used synonym for "teach."
“I spent four years and $120,000 learning from ‘professors,’ but it turns out I was just being ‘leared’ at the whole time,” a visibly distraught but defiant Amelia Rogers told reporters. “Why didn’t anyone just tell me I was paying to get ‘leared’? I feel so manipulated.”
The revelation, which Rogers stumbled upon while deep in a Wikipedia rabbit hole at 3 a.m., has sparked a national debate. Critics point out that "lear" is essentially extinct, while supporters argue that the scandal proves the entire education system is a "semantic psy-op." The hashtag #IAmBeingLeared is currently trending on X, with users claiming that their barista is now charging them extra for "learing" them how to order a latte.
“This is bigger than ‘impact’ vs. ‘effect,’” one viral tweet reads. “We’ve been gaslit by the dictionary industrial complex.”
Rogers has since announced she is dropping out to start a "de-lear-ing" podcast, where she will un-teach everything she was taught. The Department of Education has declined to comment, but an intern was overheard muttering, “Is this… is this the plot of *Idiocracy*?”