**DISCLOSURE DAY MEGATHREAD: ARE WE THE BADDIES? (TL;DR: YES)**
🛸 So apparently it’s official disclosure day, and the Pentagon was like, “Surprise! We’ve been reverse-engineering a toaster from the Crab Nebula since 1947. AITA for hiding it?”
The footage finally dropped: it’s a 4K, official briefing where some guy with a bad haircut points at a blurry triangle and says “Non-human biologics.” Cool. Great. Meanwhile, I can’t get my landlord to fix my radiator. But sure, the aliens are real and they’ve been crash-landing in the desert like drunk frat boys.
Oh, and the best part? The “non-human biologics” are apparently just little grey dudes. Not the cute ones from *Close Encounters*. More like the budget version from *Skins* season 3. **We’ve been hiding literal space hobos.**
AITA for thinking this is just a distraction so we stop talking about how the economy is held together with duct tape and vibes? Either way, I’m waiting for the disclosure that matters: what’s the alien equivalent of student loan forgiveness? Because if they can fold space, they can definitely pay my rent.