**BREAKING: STEVEN TYLER BANNED FROM LOCAL DINER for "DISGRACING the ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT BUFFET"**

BREAKING: STEVEN TYLER BANNED FROM LOCAL DINER FOR “DISGRACING THE ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT BUFFET”

Fenton, MI – In what locals are calling a “long-overdue dose of common sense,” Aerosmith frontman Steven Tyler has been officially banned from the “Golden Spoon Family Buffet” after a widely circulated cellphone video shows the rock legend allegedly attempting to “dine and dance” through the lunch rush.

According to eyewitness and angry local resident Karen Miller, Tyler entered the establishment wearing his signature scarves and what she described as “sunglasses indoors like he’s above the rules.”

“He grabbed three plates, loaded up on mac and cheese and those little meatballs, then started twirling between the dessert station and the salad bar,” Miller fumed in the Fenton Family & Friends Facebook Group. “This is a working-class buffet. Not a concert stage. My kids are trying to eat their chicken nuggets in peace.”

The diner’s owner, a soft-spoken man named Dmitri, reportedly escorted Tyler out after the singer allegedly attempted to use a spoon as a microphone to serenade a tray of Jell-O. A sign now hangs in the front window: “NO PURPLE SCARVES. NO AIR GUITAR. COMMON SENSE RESERVES THE RIGHT TO REFUSE SERVICE.”

The police were not called, but a local spokesperson confirmed, “If you can’t handle a buffet with basic dignity, you don’t belong in Fenton.”