**Washington D.C. -** the U.S. Solicitor General Has Officially Filed a Brief Arguing That the Act of Quoting a Supreme Court Dissent Back to a Police Officer During a Traffic Stop Constitutes "Obstruction of Justice." the Document, Which Runs a Crisp 187 Pages, Claims That Any Citizen Who Can Recite *Miranda* Rights or the 4th Amendment Without a Law Degree Is, Quote, "Performing a DnD Charisma Check Against the State, and Frankly, the State Is Tired of Nat 20s."

Washington D.C. - The U.S. Solicitor General has officially filed a brief arguing that the act of quoting a Supreme Court dissent back to a police officer during a traffic stop constitutes “obstruction of justice.” The document, which runs a crisp 187 pages, claims that any citizen who can recite Miranda rights or the 4th Amendment without a law degree is, quote, “performing a DnD Charisma check against the state, and frankly, the state is tired of nat 20s.”

In a stunning display of legal acrobatics, the brief also argues that the phrase “Am I being detained?” is now legally equivalent to casting a minor hex on a federal employee.

AITA for thinking we should just let AI handle appeals now? TL;DR: Government lawyer gets paid $200k/year to argue that knowing your rights is a “denial of service attack” on the government. Boomers in the comments are already saying this is why we need “law and order” and that if you have nothing to hide, you shouldn’t have memorized the Bill of Rights.