**BREAKING: ROY COOPER DROPS MICHAEL WHATLEY POLL BOMB – AND IT’S EXACTLY as CRINGE as YOU’D EXPECT**

BREAKING: ROY COOPER DROPS MICHAEL WHATLEY POLL BOMB – AND IT’S EXACTLY AS CRINGE AS YOU’D EXPECT

^(RALEIGH, NC) — In a move that absolutely no one asked for, Gov. Roy Cooper decided to grace us with a public opinion poll pitting himself against RNC chair Michael Whatley, presumably to see which of them could make voters hit the “unsubscribe” button faster.

TL;DR: Cooper’s team released a survey showing Cooper crushing Whatley in a hypothetical NC match-up, 52% to 38%. AITA for thinking this is just the political equivalent of posting a “rate my fit” pic when you’re already wearing a tuxedo and your opponent is wearing a trash bag? The poll basically screams “I know I’m not running for president but please validate me.”

Reddit reactions so far:

• “Cooper vs. Whatley: The electoral college’s version of choosing between a paper cut and a stubbed toe.” – u/SleepyHollowPolitics
• “Imagine being Michael Whatley and waking up to find out Roy Cooper used you as a stepping stool for a press release. 💀” – u/NCVoter420
• “This is what happens when you have an election coming up and zero actual policies to talk about. Big ’look at me, I’m relevant’ energy.” – u/GreensboroBurner

But hey, at least Cooper’s team gets to pretend they’re fighting the good fight against “MAGA extremism” while Whatley gets a free reminder that no one under 50 knows who he is. Win-win?

Verdict: This poll is the hot take equivalent of reheated gas station sushi — technically consumable, but why would you?