**AITA for Assuming Red Lobster's Tallahassee Location Finally Closed Because Someone Ordered the Endless Shrimp and the Universe Decided *That* Was the Final Straw?**

AITA for assuming Red Lobster’s Tallahassee location finally closed because someone ordered the Endless Shrimp and the universe decided that was the final straw?

TL;DR: The Tallahassee Red Lobster has shuttered, and the internet is acting like we lost a Michelin-starred institution. Cue the dramatic violin for the world’s most mid cheddar bay biscuit.

Apparently, the local franchise couldn’t handle the sheer economic firepower of a Florida retiree couponing their way through 47 baskets of popcorn shrimp on a Tuesday. Yes, the “seafood” chain famous for serving what can only be described as “land-based arthropods in a butter vat” has closed another location. The official statement is probably something about “restructuring” and “market conditions,” but we all know the truth: the ghost of that one Karen who demanded a refund because the lobster “looked at her wrong” finally manifested and absorbed the building’s equity.

So pour one out for the jumbo lump crab cakes. Actually, don’t. They were 90% filler. Red Lobster’s Tallahassee closure is the most exciting thing to happen to that city since they moved a bus stop. At least now the poor staff can go work somewhere that doesn’t make you smell like a wet dock after your shift.

Thoughts, Reddit? Should we start a GoFundMe for the lost Cheddar Bay Biscuit supply chain? Or is this just the universe’s way of telling us to eat a vegetable for once?