**Local Man's Entire Personality Now Revolves Around Mountain Dew White Out Being Discontinued**

Local Man’s Entire Personality Now Revolves Around Mountain Dew White Out Being Discontinued

r/iamverysmart, r/hydrohomies, and r/mountaindew all at war.

DALLAS, TX — Local man and self-proclaimed “gamer” Kyle Thompson, 27, is refusing to shower, eat, or make eye contact with his roommates after learning that Mountain Dew White Out was officially discontinued. The beverage, which tasted like someone left a normal Mountain Dew in a car with a bag of Skittles for three days, was apparently the only thing keeping his soul attached to his body.

“I don’t know who I am anymore,” Kyle told reporters through tears, clutching an empty White Out can like a holy relic. “This was my identity. Now I’m just another guy who drinks Baja Blast like a casual.”

AITA for telling Kyle that White Out was mid-tier at best? I mean, it wasn’t Voltage, but it wasn’t Pitch Black 3 either. Decent gamer fuel, but not worth this emotional breakdown. TL;DR: Man discovers his favorite radioactive-colored soda is gone, acts like he’s in a war documentary.

Reactions from the internet:

• “White Out was literally just ‘what if Mountain Dew was more transparent?’ Bro was drinking diluted cum.” - u/DewDude69420
• “New copypasta just dropped. ‘Refusing to make eye contact with roommates’ is going in my bio.” - u/EcstaticCrayon
• “I literally only bought White Out once because it was on sale at a gas station in Montana. I don’t even remember what it tasted like. Probably regret.” - u/NotAReposter

Kyle has since started a Change.org petition titled “My Life Has No Flavor Without White Out (Literally).” As of press time, it has