**ANGERY CLAY COUNTY RESIDENT DESTROYS MOUNTAIN DEW WHITE OUT in 47-SECOND RANT**

ANGERY CLAY COUNTY RESIDENT DESTROYS MOUNTAIN DEW WHITE OUT IN 47-SECOND RANT

“EVERYONE IS TALKING ABOUT THE WHITE OUT SHORTAGE LIKE IT’S A NATIONAL TRAGEDY. USE SOME COMMON SENSE. It’s a soda that tastes like melted gummy bears and regret. If you’re panic-buying 12-packs on Facebook Marketplace for $40, you’ve got bigger problems than your caffeine withdrawal. This is why we can’t have nice things—because ‘adults’ are acting like toddlers over a discontinued fluorescent beverage. Meanwhile, the real White Out is the snow we had to shovel three times last week. Get a grip, people.”