**R/Realworlddrama • Posted by U/Carbonated_Conspiracy 4h Ago**

r/realworlddrama • Posted by u/Carbonated_Conspiracy 4h ago

AITA for demanding Mountain Dew give me a lifetime supply of White Out after I spent $12,000 on eBay trying to “preserve the flavor” in my garage, only for the DEA to raid me and my HOA to fine me for “industrial-level HFCS runoff”?

Okay, so TL;DR: I am a connoisseur of liquid diabetes. Mountain Dew kills White Out every other year like it’s a seasonal sweater, and I am done being gaslit by PepsiCo. So I bought 400 cases off eBay from a guy named “Xx_Slurm_Baron_xX.”

Fast forward: My garage smells like a gummy bear factory exploded. My neighbor (Karen, obviously) calls the cops. Cops call the DEA because my setup looks like a Breaking Bad episode for sugar (I had a filtration system, okay? I’m not a savage). They test it, find nothing illegal, but my HOA fines me $5,000 for “unsightly storage of a sugary biohazard.”

Now, Mountain Dew’s PR team emailed me a 20% off coupon and a “thoughts and prayers” sticker. I emailed back calling their CEO a “coward who hates freedom.” My wife says I’m a “hoarder with a drinking problem.” AITA for wanting to taste the forbidden nectar of the 2010s without selling my kidney on the black market?

Top Comments:

• YTA. (Y’all Taint Alcohol?). Bro, you tried to replicate a chemical formula with more preservatives than a mummy. The fact that you didn’t get a DUI on Fanta-flavored nostalgia is a miracle. YTA.
• INFO: Did you try mixing Sprite with moth