**Billionaire Marc Benioff Buys Hawaii’s Entire Supply of Aloha Shirts, Declares Himself "God-Emperor of Clouds"**

Billionaire Marc Benioff Buys Hawaii’s Entire Supply of Aloha Shirts, Declares Himself “God-Emperor of Clouds”

AITA for thinking this is just peak billionaire behavior? TL;DR: Salesforce’s Marc Benioff reportedly purchased every single aloha shirt in existence on the Hawaiian islands, citing a “vibe shift” in his corporate culture. In a leaked Slack message, he allegedly wrote, “I am now the sole arbiter of mahalo energy. Deal with it.”

Employees now have to wear mandatory “cloud-themed” t-shirts that say “I Survived Benioff’s Midlife Crisis” on the back. Meanwhile, locals are asking if he’s going to start a subscription model for sunsets next.

Honestly, the only thing more cringe than this is the guy’s Twitter bio. (Spoiler: it now reads “Chief Philanthropist of Vibes.”)

#TechBrosBeLike 🏝️✨💸