(AITA for Laughing Hysterically at This?)

(AITA for laughing hysterically at this?)

BREAKFAST OF CHAMPIONS, OR BREAKFAST OF CHAOS? George Kittle’s ‘Influencer Era’ Hits Rock Bottom in Viral Protein Shake Fail

San Francisco, CA — You know how your mom always told you not to play with your food? Well, George Kittle decided to play with his entire personality and it’s giving, well, a lot.

In a video that has already been meme’d into the shadow realm, the 49ers tight end—who is apparently allergic to offseasons without doing something absolutely unhinged—decided to film himself trying to “optimize” his morning protein shake.

What was the “optimization”?

He put an entire, unpeeled banana, three raw eggs (shells and all), a scoop of “mystery meat” powder (we’re assuming it’s not human), and half a cup of pickle juice into a blender. He then chugged it, looked directly into the camera, and said: “This is what peak performance tastes like.”

The video cuts to him clearly swallowing, his eyes watering, and then a very distinct silent, wet burp that he tried to pass off as a “post-workout power release.”

The internet’s verdict? A resounding YIKES.

“Bro just invented a new Olympic sport: Competitive Self-Lothing.” - u/Deflate_Gate_Enjoyer “That’s going to be a hard pass from me, chief. And probably from my colon.” - u/YAC_Bro “Is he trying to avoid paying child support? Because that smoothie is a war crime against pickles.” - u/Hurdle_King69

TL;DR: George Kittle is either a genius level troll or