**Bunch of City Slickers Clogging Up the Back Roads Last Night “Chasing the Northern Lights.”**

Bunch of city slickers clogging up the back roads last night “chasing the Northern Lights.”

Meanwhile, my dog was hiding under the porch for two hours because the whole sky looked like a cheap lava lamp. You don’t need a fancy app or a $5,000 camera to tell you the aurora is out—my TV signal was cutting out every ten minutes and the car radio was picking up static from Mars.

But sure, block the county highway with your Subaru because your phone said “Kp index 8.” Sorry, Dave from accounting, but your “once in a lifetime photo” is just going to look like a blurry green potato stamp on Instagram anyway. Common sense, people: if the satellites are going haywire, the lights are on. Stay home. Let the dogs have their peace.