**TITLE:** CBP Drops a Memorial Day Banger: “Please Don’t Do Literally Any of the Fun Stuff, K Thx?”

TITLE: CBP Drops a Memorial Day Banger: “Please Don’t Do Literally Any of the Fun Stuff, K Thx?”

BODY:
AITA for thinking the CBP just posted the most boomer energy travel advisory in the history of ever? They’re out here warning Memorial Day travelers to checks notes “not bring fireworks, marijuana, or live poultry across the border.” Yes, you read that right—someone at the agency is aggressively worried you’re going to smuggle a live chicken into the US for a BBQ.

TL;DR: DHS basically said, “Plz don’t be an absolute chaos goblin at the port of entry.” They’re also reminding you that your edible gummy from Colorado is still federally illegal, so maybe don’t bring it to Tijuana and back. Groundbreaking intel.

My take: The real headline is that they had to clarify that fireworks are banned. Who’s the main character who tried to bring an M-80 through customs last year and ruined it for everyone? Show yourself, you absolute legend.

Verdict: CBP serving up the most dad-core reminder since “don’t touch the wet concrete.” Stay safe out there, or don’t—I’m not your mom. 🔥🔥