**BREAKING: SUPREME COURT RULES on PIVOTAL MEME CASE, SHATTERING the FABRIC of REALITY**

BREAKING: SUPREME COURT RULES ON PIVOTAL MEME CASE, SHATTERING THE FABRIC OF REALITY

Washington D.C. – The Supreme Court, in a landmark 5-4 decision delivered today, has effectively declared that if you can’t tell the difference between a real news headline and a satirical post, you are legally required to show your work. The ruling, stemming from the case Dank v. The State of Credulity, centers on the controversial “Fool Me Once” precedent, which now states that a meme shared three times in a group chat transforms into legally binding truth for the purposes of your uncle’s Thanksgiving dinner arguments.

Justice Alito, in a blistering dissent joined by Thomas and Gorsuch, warned that this decision will “legitimize the chaos of the Group Chat,” and lamented that the Court had “failed to distinguish between a deeply nuanced legal argument and a perfectly timed GIF of a cat falling off a chair.”

The majority opinion, penned by Chief Justice Roberts, famously includes a lengthy footnote that is just the lyrics to “All Star” by Smash Mouth. Legal analysts are calling it “the most comprehensive use of Shrek jurisprudence in American history.” Reaction online has been swift, with Twitter/X user @LordMarvelFan420 declaring, “SCOTUS just admitted the legal system is a 4D chess game played by the same people who argue that pineapple on pizza is a constitutionally protected right.”

Protests have already begun, with one group holding signs reading “My Body, My Meme” and another chanting “I have the Right to Bear Arms (and Post Them Cropped).” The Court has not yet ruled on whether this decision applies to PDFs or screenshots of Yelp reviews.